Happy birthday, love. I thought of you the entire day-and every and night since. I miss you so much. You no longer can control me, but my heart and soul and body still ache for you. The look in your eyes that I used to believe was only for me, the strength in your arms, and god-the smell–the taste of you. I will never find your equal–at least in my bedroom, but the user…the manipulator…the sociopath that you are… for that I must be glad you are no longer with me. I love you, my Joseph. Always. Forever. No holding back. I wish you would get your head out of your fucking ass, my love–and come home. you are missed.