My life has made an unexpected, though anticipated turn. My youngest, and possibly the most adult of us all, has officially moved in with her boyfriend, whom i adore as though he were one of my own …without any ick factor. I have delivered to them (her) one car-a 2012 mazda – paid for, one kitten, fierce hearted and a bundle of both energy and love for his new mum and dad – i will miss that straw thieving pafooted opportunistic robber with my whole heart, but 2 keyboards ruined is about enough for that. He went with a litter box and all related supplies, ample kitten kibble, mousie toys, catnip and a chinese finger trap with which he is to be headbopped. They got a kitchen table, fantatic “i’m in my 20s” chairs, and kitchen decorations–napkin rings that match the placemats i am making them. And i made sure they had their downpayment, am paying for their car insurance and even tried to buy a car for her bf as well.
And yet, i still feel inadequate. I am not allowed to let anyone know i bought her car, not permitted to say i pay the insurance, and my own family throws every penny they spend for her in my face. It seems they all want to play the ‘one up’ game, and i have to just lie, smile and take the diggs. They hurt. Yes, my brother bought her great stuff for the kitchen…it was not necessary because
She could have had what he bought me. I will never have my own place again. I bought food, so he bought twice as much. This is my child, damnit, must i lose this one too? Have i not yet lost enough? What more is required before i can actually be classified as a caring mother who still helps her child and not just a life sucking leech?